Guilty Pleasures

[d_aulnoy]

It seems as though everybody, but everybody on my f-list is treating themselves to ice cream as a treat tonight.  Sincerely, enjoy the brain-freeze, everybody!  I have to say, though, this is one guilty pleasure that I just do not, and have never gotten ... 

Even before the whole Evil Milk Allergy Raised its Ugly Head, I never so much ... got ... ice cream.  Ices?  Sure.  I could eat those things by the cubic foot, especially the kind that you make yourself by freezing OJ in a glass with a spoon for the handle (well, until the glass cracks when you're trying to pull it out and you find yourself pondering the question of whether consuming it after that would be dangerous, because, damnit, it is August, and you want something cold and citrusy, and then you realize that you, a) might be drifting into the realms of addiction, and b) should not ever attempt to "cook" in the sense of "set foot in the kitchen" and, b1) yes, you know that there are such things as molds, you just never chose to buy them, and that finally makes you realize that it's time to switch over to straight shots of that RealLemonTM stuff kept on the top shelf of the fridge), but I'm not so down with the ice cream.  I mean, I like sweet things, like chocolate, but the wonders of ice cream persistantly evade me.

That might be because the wonders of summer evade me.

But.  The peculiar persistance of ice cream on my f-list, if not in my fridge, made me start wondering the topic of guilty pleasures.  I don't mean the awful "but I'm actually really proud of it!" kind of a guilty pleasure that might be represented by "being a workaholic" or "reading too much" or the obvious guilty pleasure of liking "a night on the town."  I mean, really weird, specific guilty pleasures that represent luxory to y'all.  For me, we've got cigarettes, expensive shoes, books in general because of their gradual encroachment on all areas of my life, and those Sour Belt things that they sell in your cheaper brand of deli (which, seriously I think I once suffered an addiction to, because I would eat them until I burned bald spots into my tongue ... I'm not allowed to buy those anymore).

Because, tonight, to parallel the GN planned for Saturday, I'm having a quiet one of my own ... watching heist flicks (guilty pleasure) starring Gina Gershon (guilty pleasure) while chain-smoking (guilty pleasure) and sipping at a fine cognac (not so much a guilty pleasure, though it probably should be) while painting my finger and toe-nails and giving myself a facial (which ... shouldn't be a guilty pleasure, but is, because it feels a bit too decadently girly).  But none of these are really seasonal ...

I mean ... I hate summer in NY, generally, but I like having an actual pressing reason to wear skirts.  That's kinda a guilty pleasure.  I love not having any deadlines and being able to sit outside at a bar sipping a glass of red at three in the morning to enjoy a good conversation (possibly, even probably, all gussied up in a skirt).  I like being able to sweat.  Definititely a guilty pleasure, as far to many people in NY engage in it without guilt, especially in the subway, but the whole sauna feel of it is kinda nice, assuming that you are not in the sun, in a hurry, or in the presence of anybody you need to impress (because, summer interviews and/or summer dates?  Hell ...). 

Autumn is one long round of guilty pleasures: yanking out the knee high boots for "warmth," telling yourself that you're smoking to "warm up," letting the Indian summer feeling linger until the point when, yes, you have to admit that you are actually procrastinating, enjoying the vague narcotic smell of mimeograph paper and all it portends ... I love autumn most, I think.

Winter lets you spend way too much money, and eat delicious food with none of the general guilt of "oh, god, it's going to my hips, and everyone will see!" which the numerous "In Summer, Salad Only" women of NY seem to espouse ( I swear to god, I went to the grocery store today, and a lovely lanky lady ahead of me in the line bought nothing but frozen packages of spinach, which ... what?), as well as allievating the grotesque bloat which hits you as soon as you leave a resturaunt happy and full-fend only to feel the food decomposing in your stomach once you hit the street.  You get to wear weird hats, and you get to admit that, no, you never actually did bother to grow up, and, yes, you do still get a huge kick out of hitting unsuspecting friends in the back of the head with snowballs.

Spring ... well, I like rain, which I don't feel guilty about, but which I am pretty much alone in.  Plus, spring is Conference Season, which always makes me happy.  But spring is not, I admit, a favorite, because it always means that the end is near and that soon the entire city will feel like it's doing a conga line through the intestinal tract of a T-Rex. 

So ... people, what are your guilty pleasures?

Comments

[vschanoes.livejournal.com]

Comic books. I realize that there are people with good taste who are on the cutting edge who, when they read comic books, read very hip and classy stuff like *Strangers in Paradise* or *Sandman* or what have you. I am not those people, and those are not the comic books to which I am referring. I am not even referring to *X-Men*. I realize that the Cool Kids decided that Marvel was the way to go a long time ago, but my heart has always belonged to the DC universe. So. I get back issues of *The New Teen Titans* and pre-Crisis *Wonder Woman*. I recently was hooked on Identity Crisis even though every single respectable comic book person in the world dismissed it as tripe--I like soap opera in my comic books. I'm finally coming to terms with the post-Crisis Wonder Woman and I really like the recent plot which has Athena and the other goddesses conspiring to overthrow Zeus. I'm very excited about the return of Donna Troy. It's not cool, I don't care.

On the other hand, you are clearly sick. I adore summer in NY. The only thing I'm pissed at London about is how goddamn cold it is here. I should not be wearing a jacket and stockings in June. I should be wearing tank tops and flimsy skirts. I love being hot. I love sweating. I miss summer.

[d-aulnoy.livejournal.com]

See, what I find interesting about this is that the fact that *we* define these things as "guilty" pleasures says a lot about us ... you have intellectual guilt over loving comics (which, I do too! and no one answered my soapy question about SS and EF, which leaves me frustrated to no end). I *used* to feel guilty about those, when I was 13 or so ... and then the militant part of me got so pissed off by the fact that the boys weren't, and that the boys were the ones who got asked if they needed anything in stores, that I ... geeked out in reaction, I suppose. And, well, once I lose a shame, it ain't never coming back. Even though *now* I *should* feel intellectual shame, having gotten over the gender shame, the comics=shame of any sort equation just doesn't get me ...

(P.S. - Relating to your Dr. Who post ... have you read Gaiman's fist Books of Magic? There's an issue in which Dr. Who guides Timothy, and, in the Otherworld, *is* Rose ...)

And, well, that right there is the problem ... I, too, like flimsy clothes. And sweat, in context. But I'm prone to *actually* getting sick because of excesive heat, which makes summer in NY ... not so fun for me.

SO looking forward to London ...

P.S. - Why are you never on IM? BE ON IM.

[penmage.livejournal.com]

In which issue does Dr. Who guide Tim? In the first volume of Books of Magic? Where?

[vschanoes.livejournal.com]

'Cause I'm working on deadline to get an essay for a friend's zine done.

Whaddaya mean this Timothy character is Rose? Just that he travels with the Doctor? Because traditionally, the Doctor has a young, attractive companion, usually female but sometimes male. Sometimes he has more than one. Who's Timothy?

I don't think it's an intellectual shame thing, so much as an uncool shame thing. See, if I read X-Men or...I don't know, Love and Rockets, or whatever comics you read that get the approving thumbs-up from the Forbidden Planet clerks, then I wouldn't feel shame. But have no interest in the X-Men. I never got into League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. I like DC. And not only do I like DC, I like the most mainstream DC. I like Wonder Woman. Even when it comes to the new stuff, I still like DC. I like The Authority. It's not cool.

[d-aulnoy.livejournal.com]

Whoops ... I screwed up. It's not Dr. Who, but rather Dr. Occult (who always seemed like a cheap Dr. Who ripoff to me, having never watched the series). But his alter-ego, his *persona* in the otherworld, really is a female named Rose, which seems like a refence of sorts to the series, at least ...

[d-aulnoy.livejournal.com]

And, once again, LJ decides to screw with my posting decisions.

So, on the topic of the second issue of shame ... I like the comics I read, but not because they possess some intrinsic cachet, but just because they're fun. (I mean ... I own the first five issues of Gen 13, and don't ASK what I paid for them. Ditto the first run of Witchblade.) Marvel ever puts out a full fun of 70's issues in TPB, I'll be there like a shot (a broke, penniless shot). And, while I never so much got into DC, probably because I missed their big marketing push in the 80's and got into comics fairly late, if *they* ever put out a big reprint, I'd probably read those, too ... because Wonder Woman? Queen. Queen of everything ...

And, hey, congrats on the essay/zine! But be aware, I will continue to stalk you on IM till you show up. Like, maybe ... tooooooomorrow?

[schrodingersgnu.livejournal.com]

Pushing your buttons... Granted, it only becomes a guilty pleasure when it works...

Apart from that, computer games. Week-long empire building computer games. Or historical simulation games, giving me the satisfaction of creating my own alternate history. Ah, the joys of seeing my imperial Japanese marines taking Johannesburg in 1943...

[d-aulnoy.livejournal.com]

I *never knew* ... but that explains why you kicked our collective ass at Risk.

Hey, Cottage, 7?

[schrodingersgnu.livejournal.com]

Really?

Yeah, strategy games and scouting used to be my main hobbies as a teenager... I was even swedish champion in the boardgame Civilization one year. And I still play strategy games when I can. Feeeeeeeeeeeeel the geekness envelop you...

I think 7 should work.

BTW, I'm bored. IM?

watching people fall asleep in public

[chunklet.livejournal.com]

taco bell value menu. ugh. and the music in those six flag commercials with the fake elderly man dancing. most recently - yesterday i watched from a distance a woman in washington square park slump to the left and then back up again continuously back and forth on her bench (because she was just so tired i guess) for about five full minutes which is a long time. she couldn't sit up straight for more than a second at a time before the exhaustion/gravity process took hold and she teetered over almost horizontally. when she finally gave in, using her backpack as a pillow, to the sleepies, i wondered what the great weighing of priorities in her mind looked like. imagining this flow-chart was the funniest thing about this tiny drama. i realize it looked like i was laughing at her but i don't think i was. anyways, it kept me in a state of low-tech but guilty awe for a few minutes on a hot summer day, which was neat.

Re: watching people fall asleep in public

[schrodingersgnu.livejournal.com]

"the music in those six flag commercials with the fake elderly man dancing"

That would be the Venga Boys, methinks... Yes, yes, I'm somewhat ashamed for knowing, but I have a license (being european and all).

[penmage.livejournal.com]

My non-seasonal guilty pleasure is definitly cheesy SciFi movies. The ones that are made for the SciFi channel, in particular. Crossbred hammerhead shark/human boy? Love it. Canister of liquid Satan? Bring it on. Aliens invading earth to eat wood? Can't get enough of it. Reincarnated souls saving the earth from aliens depicted in comic books? I am in heaven. The cheesier the better, really, and the more ridiculous they get, the more I love them.

Winter guilty pleasures are bundling up. I love getting warm. Throw blankets, cozy sweaters, scarves, hats - I love it all, to the extent where I almost get dissapointed at the proliferation of indoor heat - because if the room you're spending the day in is warmly heated, you can't wear cozy sweaters, no matter how cold it is out. I love getting cold so I can get warm.

I also love random encounters. Talking to strangers, doing something nice for absolutely no reason at all, putting quarters in meters so people won't get tickets. These things give me a happy glow.

Another guilty pleasure is falling asleep on the couch. All too often I'll be tired, but I won't want to go to bed; I'll curl up under a throw blanket on the couch, fall asleep for a few hours, then wake up at 2am to go to bed proper. N makes fun of me for it, but I love that delicious drifting off feeling.

[freddiemac.livejournal.com]

Excuse me while i slowly, excruciatingly take away any cool points i may have, up to this point, accrued in my life...

First and foremost - Michelle Branch, Vanessa Carlton, Avril Lavigne (their musical output, thankyouverymuch), and "Toxic" by Britney Spears - every once in a while, the pop industry machine cranks out something absolutely spectacular, no matter whose face they put on it.

Web comics - there was a painful lack of printed comics in Montana when I grew up, and I never had opportunity to really get into them as an adult - but being a tech geek, my web travels have brought me to such gems as http://www.itswalky.com/ http://www.asifcomic.com and http://crfh.net - i've got a few others I check out - http://www.penny-arcade.com is pretty damn kick-ass, even to a non-gamer like me - in another life, were i not a musician, i probably would be (but i do have fond memories of Quake lunch breaks at my old job in DC)...

Mountain Dew - once upon a time, when i lived the life of a "normal" American, I had a nasty habit of putting down a 12-pack a day of this stuff. Good thing the drinking water in my hometown had so much damn flouride that i'll never have to worry about tooth decay in my life...

Corollary to the Dew - Frosted Strawberry Pop-Tarts - must be Pop-Tart, not some generic knock-off...barring that, Cool Ranch Doritos...or ice cream sandwiches (yes, all these go great with the aforementioned Dew... :) )

Stargate SG-1 - a guilty pleasure because I'm pretty much a movie purist, and generally have a distaste for TV spin-offs, and Stargate is one of my top 5 movies...but this one is surprisingly well done, interesting character interaction, and Richard Dean Anderson is just cool as hell...

The end of Matrix Revolutions, and Van Halen III - I am probably one of about 8 people on the planet who like either one of these items. I think it's a shame that the musical relationship between EVH and Gary Cherone was not allowed to flourish (even if as a "side project" not bearing the Van Halen name)

Weird Al Yankovic - the man's a genius - Bohemian Polka is probably the best cover song ever done. I wish Freddie Mercury had been alive to hear it, he would probably have bought Al a drink...or hit on him, at the very least...

Getting my nails done - for OBVIOUS reasons!!! which reminds me, i'm way overdue, I've only got little flecks of black left...

I'd better stop before I wear out my welcome...

mac

[alice-ayers.livejournal.com]

chocolate, candy...

mediocre hip-hop (do people even know..?)

annie's basil alfredo mac & cheese

manicures

wireimage dot com

trashy magazines

so, so many things I fel guilt over.