Sometimes, you just gotta laugh or ....
Aug. 6th, 2008 12:47 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
d_aulnoyMy week began with a crash - the earthquake - and ended with a whimper - the flu + a hurricane in Houston on the day I was scheduled to fly home. Needless to say, I chose to reschedule my flight.
The Gnu's new apartment (say that five times fast) is kind of shockingly awesome: all that he told me about it was that it was kinda industrial, with concrete floors and exposed pipes in the ceiling. He neglected to mention that it was in a remodeled hotel that dated to 1912 with vaulted ceilings painted with Pre-Raphaelite medallions and ornate velvet furniture in the lobby, and ceilings painted crimson red in the hallways, and gargoyles - gargoyles! - acting as apt. markers. He did mention the fact that the bathtub had a Jacuzzi function, but he completely failed to do it justice. So, the first two days I was there, we decorated (Ikea is obviously an outpost of Hell), and the second two days I lay in the now-nicely-furnished apartment and clutched fitfully at myself and consumed Gatorade by the litre.
I was sick enough to reschedule my flight, which almost never happens: I will generally trudge grimly ahead on the principle of tearing the band-aid off. And I will generally do it with panache: one of my favorite memories is the horrified look on J's face on our last morning in Venice, you know, the morning after the night that I'd spent violently rejecting the, um, experience of dining at a touristy place with pretty colored lanterns by a canal when I started to apply eye-makeup. "What are you doing?" he said? "The bare minimum for self-respect," I croaked. Well, on Tuesday, self-respect was completely absent, and there was no way in hell I was willing to get on a plane, a desire which, given the hurricane, the airline was quite happy to accomodate.
Alas, I couldn't move it any further, because I had to come home to move the car out of the garage so they could redo the roof. So, I got up early, "suffered" through an actually-quite-pleasant-but-still-exhausting flight, and made it home in decent time to pick up the cat, return long-overdue movies, run errands, etc. And the last thing on the list was moving the car ... which promptly refused to start.
This is the point at which I started to giggle maniacally. Well, that and the point at which I calledvschanoes to triumphantly exclaim that I had won the "Who's Having A Worse Day?" contest, hands-down. Because, seriously, Murphy? Inside of a week, earthquake, hurricane, a low-level plague, and now ... car trouble? I give. What's next, locusts? Consider this a white flag.
My poor Ashtray has been dragged away by Triple A, and I am headed for a soothing bath: in the meantime, I leave you with a quiet bit of sweetness in the form of ... SpyBot Search & Destroy's licensing agreement. I seriously doubt that people generally read these things, so it seemed worth highlighting: check out this well-thought-out little screed (and keep paying attention throughout, as just when you think it's about to verge into boiler-plate legalese, s/he hits you with another actual human bit of reasoning). You, SpyBot programmer? Are my antidote to the various Murphisms of the week.
P.S. - With my current run of luck, yes, I am aware that installing it will probably crash my computer. Hell, maybe even my network ....
The Gnu's new apartment (say that five times fast) is kind of shockingly awesome: all that he told me about it was that it was kinda industrial, with concrete floors and exposed pipes in the ceiling. He neglected to mention that it was in a remodeled hotel that dated to 1912 with vaulted ceilings painted with Pre-Raphaelite medallions and ornate velvet furniture in the lobby, and ceilings painted crimson red in the hallways, and gargoyles - gargoyles! - acting as apt. markers. He did mention the fact that the bathtub had a Jacuzzi function, but he completely failed to do it justice. So, the first two days I was there, we decorated (Ikea is obviously an outpost of Hell), and the second two days I lay in the now-nicely-furnished apartment and clutched fitfully at myself and consumed Gatorade by the litre.
I was sick enough to reschedule my flight, which almost never happens: I will generally trudge grimly ahead on the principle of tearing the band-aid off. And I will generally do it with panache: one of my favorite memories is the horrified look on J's face on our last morning in Venice, you know, the morning after the night that I'd spent violently rejecting the, um, experience of dining at a touristy place with pretty colored lanterns by a canal when I started to apply eye-makeup. "What are you doing?" he said? "The bare minimum for self-respect," I croaked. Well, on Tuesday, self-respect was completely absent, and there was no way in hell I was willing to get on a plane, a desire which, given the hurricane, the airline was quite happy to accomodate.
Alas, I couldn't move it any further, because I had to come home to move the car out of the garage so they could redo the roof. So, I got up early, "suffered" through an actually-quite-pleasant-but-still-exhausting flight, and made it home in decent time to pick up the cat, return long-overdue movies, run errands, etc. And the last thing on the list was moving the car ... which promptly refused to start.
This is the point at which I started to giggle maniacally. Well, that and the point at which I called
vschanoes to triumphantly exclaim that I had won the "Who's Having A Worse Day?" contest, hands-down. Because, seriously, Murphy? Inside of a week, earthquake, hurricane, a low-level plague, and now ... car trouble? I give. What's next, locusts? Consider this a white flag.My poor Ashtray has been dragged away by Triple A, and I am headed for a soothing bath: in the meantime, I leave you with a quiet bit of sweetness in the form of ... SpyBot Search & Destroy's licensing agreement. I seriously doubt that people generally read these things, so it seemed worth highlighting: check out this well-thought-out little screed (and keep paying attention throughout, as just when you think it's about to verge into boiler-plate legalese, s/he hits you with another actual human bit of reasoning). You, SpyBot programmer? Are my antidote to the various Murphisms of the week.
P.S. - With my current run of luck, yes, I am aware that installing it will probably crash my computer. Hell, maybe even my network ....
Dedication Public License (DPL)
By downloading the archive, you confirm your agreement in this license.
I. Freeware
First of all, the reasons why Spybot-S&D is free:
I.a. Dedication
Spybot-S&D is dedicated to the most wonderful girl on earth :)
I.b. Binary
What do you get if you buy software? Lots of ones and zeros, nothing more. If they were distributed as art, I could understand paying it. But if the main goal of their order is to earn money - by fees or ads - I don't like it!
I.c. Conclusion
This means that I grant you the license to use Spybot-S&D as much as you like. But if you like it, I ask two things of you: say a prayer for me (and the most wonderful girl while you're at it ;) ) to your god - or whatever you believe - and wish us some luck.
II. Limitations
II.a. Reverse Engineering
Reverse Engineering is not allowed as with nearly any software. If anyone has doubts in the honesty of the code, I will give insight to a trusted organization like a university under certain limitations (for example only one copy, for a limited time, and that has to be removed after the evaluation time has ended).
II.b. Warranty
I tried my very best to make the code of Spybot-S&D as stable as possible, and I give you the warranty that I placed no code to cause intentional harm to your system.
However, removing the threats targeted by Spybot-S&D sometimes involves cutting deep into the system sometimes, and I cannot guarantee that your system will be running the same as before. For example, spyware hosts may stop working.
I can also give you no warranty that Spybot-S&D will remove every spy on your system, or that it will give you no false positives. For your own verification the location of the problem is shown with every entry, and if you have any questions remaining you can visit the support forum for more information.
II.c. Liability
Under no circumstances can you make me liable for any damage, however caused, including, but not limited to damage you might do to your system using Spybot-S&D.
II.d. Use of application in whole
Free use is limited to the application in whole. Usage of parts only, for example the database or the plug-ins, is not permitted.
II.e. Corporate use
As companies are not individual persons and would have problems fullfilling the above terms, there is a license for corporate users that can be found at safer-networking.ie.
III. Distribution
Here are some basic rules about distributing Spybot-S&D.
III.a. Private distribution
You may give away single copies of the software as long as you don't modify this license or other files of the archive.
III.b. Mirroring
If you want to mirror Spybot-S&D, feel free to do so as long as you don't modify the original archive. If you want to be kept up to date about major updates, you can subscribe to the mailing list.
Official mirrors need to fulfill the Mirror Policy I created ( http://www.safer-networking.org/en/paragraphs/mirrorpolicy.html ).
III.c. Publishing
You may publish Spybot-S&D in a book or magazine (or other media) by simply sending a written request for permission, including a description of your specific needs. I request a copy of the media in which SpyBot-S&D is published as compensation.
IV. Privacy
IV.a. Application offline privacy
Even though Spybot-S&D scans your system, it will not search specifically for any personally identifiable information. Everything that is not detected as a possible threat will be ignored. Possible threats will be shown and, if log options are switched on, written to a local log file.
IV.b. Application online privacy
Spybot-S&D has online functionality in 5 cases:
1. Update: The Update function uses only HTTP requests (like your web browser does) to download an info file containing update descriptions (this is called spybotsd.ini, and it won't be deleted, so you can look at it) and to download the update files you select. No information other than those your browser would also show will be transmitted.
2. News: The News function opens an IE window integrated into Spybot-S&D. This is the same as if you would load the News page on our main homepage ( http://www.safer-networking.org/ ) in Internet Explorer.
3. Bug Report: The bug report function sends the problem description you enter and an automatically created report to our support staff. You can modify the extent of the report on the settings page, and you can preview this sole contents while you are writing the bug report.
Files listed in the attach box will be send as attachments. The header will contain the information (sender name & address) you've entered in settings.
4. Product info & opt-out links: those may often link to dubious pages. You may open them at your own risk, but you should take care to meet some security measures (like firewall, latest IE updates, updated antivirus software) first.
5. Other links: Due to the nature of the Internet I cannot give you any guarantee regarding other links found on my web pages (neither my own, the support forum, or the donation site). But I have put my trust into them and do not believe any harm can come from them.
By downloading the archive, you confirm your agreement in this license.
I. Freeware
First of all, the reasons why Spybot-S&D is free:
I.a. Dedication
Spybot-S&D is dedicated to the most wonderful girl on earth :)
I.b. Binary
What do you get if you buy software? Lots of ones and zeros, nothing more. If they were distributed as art, I could understand paying it. But if the main goal of their order is to earn money - by fees or ads - I don't like it!
I.c. Conclusion
This means that I grant you the license to use Spybot-S&D as much as you like. But if you like it, I ask two things of you: say a prayer for me (and the most wonderful girl while you're at it ;) ) to your god - or whatever you believe - and wish us some luck.
II. Limitations
II.a. Reverse Engineering
Reverse Engineering is not allowed as with nearly any software. If anyone has doubts in the honesty of the code, I will give insight to a trusted organization like a university under certain limitations (for example only one copy, for a limited time, and that has to be removed after the evaluation time has ended).
II.b. Warranty
I tried my very best to make the code of Spybot-S&D as stable as possible, and I give you the warranty that I placed no code to cause intentional harm to your system.
However, removing the threats targeted by Spybot-S&D sometimes involves cutting deep into the system sometimes, and I cannot guarantee that your system will be running the same as before. For example, spyware hosts may stop working.
I can also give you no warranty that Spybot-S&D will remove every spy on your system, or that it will give you no false positives. For your own verification the location of the problem is shown with every entry, and if you have any questions remaining you can visit the support forum for more information.
II.c. Liability
Under no circumstances can you make me liable for any damage, however caused, including, but not limited to damage you might do to your system using Spybot-S&D.
II.d. Use of application in whole
Free use is limited to the application in whole. Usage of parts only, for example the database or the plug-ins, is not permitted.
II.e. Corporate use
As companies are not individual persons and would have problems fullfilling the above terms, there is a license for corporate users that can be found at safer-networking.ie.
III. Distribution
Here are some basic rules about distributing Spybot-S&D.
III.a. Private distribution
You may give away single copies of the software as long as you don't modify this license or other files of the archive.
III.b. Mirroring
If you want to mirror Spybot-S&D, feel free to do so as long as you don't modify the original archive. If you want to be kept up to date about major updates, you can subscribe to the mailing list.
Official mirrors need to fulfill the Mirror Policy I created ( http://www.safer-networking.org/en/paragraphs/mirrorpolicy.html ).
III.c. Publishing
You may publish Spybot-S&D in a book or magazine (or other media) by simply sending a written request for permission, including a description of your specific needs. I request a copy of the media in which SpyBot-S&D is published as compensation.
IV. Privacy
IV.a. Application offline privacy
Even though Spybot-S&D scans your system, it will not search specifically for any personally identifiable information. Everything that is not detected as a possible threat will be ignored. Possible threats will be shown and, if log options are switched on, written to a local log file.
IV.b. Application online privacy
Spybot-S&D has online functionality in 5 cases:
1. Update: The Update function uses only HTTP requests (like your web browser does) to download an info file containing update descriptions (this is called spybotsd.ini, and it won't be deleted, so you can look at it) and to download the update files you select. No information other than those your browser would also show will be transmitted.
2. News: The News function opens an IE window integrated into Spybot-S&D. This is the same as if you would load the News page on our main homepage ( http://www.safer-networking.org/ ) in Internet Explorer.
3. Bug Report: The bug report function sends the problem description you enter and an automatically created report to our support staff. You can modify the extent of the report on the settings page, and you can preview this sole contents while you are writing the bug report.
Files listed in the attach box will be send as attachments. The header will contain the information (sender name & address) you've entered in settings.
4. Product info & opt-out links: those may often link to dubious pages. You may open them at your own risk, but you should take care to meet some security measures (like firewall, latest IE updates, updated antivirus software) first.
5. Other links: Due to the nature of the Internet I cannot give you any guarantee regarding other links found on my web pages (neither my own, the support forum, or the donation site). But I have put my trust into them and do not believe any harm can come from them.