Honestly, I'm going to start a community for this shit ...

[d_aulnoy]

... the last one, prior to flashing me with his mutual funds and asking how people "got sweaty" in this town in summers, informed me that I "have eager lips, generous eyes, and inquisitive breasts." I'm sorry, but unless this is a fill in the blank situation and you're running low on disposable consonants, INQUISITVE? What the bloody hell would they be inquisitive *about*?

At Starbucks:
Man, who do they think they're fooling, calling those "cups"?

At the travel agent:
You can't *seriously* be recommending Sag Harbor to *us,* can you?

Around the water-cooler:
I've found that this job has a lot of perks, haven't you?

I mean, I doubt that they're running around out there without my supervision, asking Stephen Hawking just what he means by withdrawing his theories on neutrino stars or pondering the philosophical implications of the Arian heresy. WHAT are these people THINKING?

Comments

[cataptromancer.livejournal.com]

I'm too lazy to check now, but there MUST be a community called something like baddates ("Bad dates, Indy!") or horribleblinddates or stupidthingsmensay, right? If not, you should definitely start one, although unless my life really changes I'll only be able to lurk and laugh.

[kijjohnson.livejournal.com]

Your breasts stopped by my room once to see if we had any chocolate left in our minibar. I told them no, and they said they going to go down to the bar and check whether there was anything interesting going on, but I don't know if they actually went there.

[d-aulnoy.livejournal.com]

Damn! So _that's_ how I got that tattoo ...

[omnia-mutantur.livejournal.com]

now i want panhandling breasts.